Thursday, 15 May 2008


I was perusing I Am Bored the other day and it contained a link to The 10 Most Terrifying Video Game Enemies of All Time.

Being the video game fangirl that I am I had to take a peek, and whilst I agreed with a couple I thought the list was, well, a bit lame. So here is my own personal list of 5 least favourite thingies in pooter games.

5 - Sonic the Hedgehog.

Yeah, it was in the original list, but it was true, that fucking music that started up with the oh so cheesily fonted countdown timer on screen instantly caused "Oh my fucking god where's the bubbles? I need to get out NOW" hysterics.

4 - Resident Evil 2

The game was full of nasty things but was my favouritest of all the Resi's. God knows how many times I played it through to get some sort of quick time completion thingy. Things however got interesting when you unlocked the second stories. All very fun until helicopters started dropping flashing mac giant men. Who would stomp down the corridor in a mindless fashion intent on bludgeoning you to death with their big meaty fists. Bastards.

3 - T Rex from Tomb Raider

This one was a complete shock. I remember skipping quite cheerfully through the huge valley having dispatched the cheeky raptors with style and grace (jump and shoot ftw) when with no prior warning the biggest badly rendered lizard EVER stomps into view and promptly devours you, leaving you gibbering quietly at the screen and refusing to ever go back there.

2 - Silent Hill

I was kinda shocked by the lists complete lack of Silent Hill beings, while it was mostly the overall atmosphere of the game that left you pondering your sanity the monsters were mostly indistinguishable blobs with sharp bits. The ones that messed with my head the most were the black babies, or Larval Stalkers, to give them their proper name. These little blighters stalked the corridors of the school, didn't hurt you but made your radio go insane and squeaked in a wholly disturbing fashion at you. I actually couldn't sleep without the light on after them.

In joint first - Forbidden Siren and Warlock of Firetop mountain

Forbidden Siren was one of my blockbuster rental jobs, I had this game for 2 days and it was a love hate relationship. I loved it because it was very very well made, and had loads of clever little touches, however I hated it because it was FUCKING SCARY. You had this ability to see throught the eyes of the monster, when you could see what they were seeing you knew how you could sneak round them, useful as you'd foolishly been given no weapons. All very well and good until you see through the eyes of one who is looking at a hedge, and is making horrible guttaral breathing grunty noises. Then you skip round and they charge at you making more excited noises and then knock you over and eat/violate your near dead body. Nasty.

Warlock was one of the first games I ever played. It was on the spectrum and consisted of a map filled with pixellated spiders and little purple things. I doubt anyone else in the world has played it but it was fiendishly addictive. The plan was you'd run into rooms collecting keys and then go and fight a warlock kill him, open the chest, and escape... Apart from the fact that the warlock was the biggest cunt in the world and you didn't know which room he was in, and would often happen upon by mistake and get your arse handed to you. He was pure evil and I never ever managed to slay the little bastard, a sad fact that still haunts me today.

Teh Warlock!

1 comment:

willowzee said...

I don't freak easy but holy HELL Silent Hill made me jump all the time, those friggin sirens!!!!!!