Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez

Look it me! (Slutting it up in an alleyway as per usual)

D:Ream

Sadly this isn't a post about the hugely popular group from the early nineties, I just used it cos it sounded good at the time. Although this post is about dreams. As seen in previous posts I've always been a fairly vivid dreams. I even think I've had some nostradamus type visions in my dreams (for example, I dreamt I was on one of them red london buses with the open roofs and it was being followed by a fireball/meteorite, the next day it was on the news that someone, possibly the IRA I'm not sure, had blown up a london bus) anyway, these have always made me slightly wary of my own dreams. Which all makes it slightly hard when for the last few weeks nearly every single one of my dreams has been a nightmare. The worst one was the other night, I'm not going into it but it kinda makes me not want to sleep anymore. Obviously I did go to sleep and dreamt that Tie was having an affair, all very jolly until I realise that Tie had been downstairs on the tooter while I was asleep.

It's all fairly possible that my dreams are my paranoia's raising their ugly heads. Do I think Tie is having an affair? No. But now I can't fight off the sickening feeling I felt in my dream.

All things considered I should either A:Stop eating cheese before bed B:Find some sleepers or C:Get over myself. But for now I feel much better for involving a small part of the world in my imaginary drahmah.

kthnxbai

Willow creates nostalgia, Kitty dives in gleefully

The delightful Ms Zander did a bloggity blog post on nostaligia, and asked everyone to do one of their own, rather than fill her comments with my tales I thought I'd do it here, clever no?

When I originally joined SL in the dark dark days of 2004 I was a complete retard. This was compounded by not having the 'proper' graphics card and therefore rendering everything on an avatar completely invisdible apart from their eyes and any prims (this was 2004 though, people didn't wear prims because when they did they were shunned by society for creating lag). Pathetically I whimpered at the help people (god I miss them) and met Alliez Mysterio, who took me under her wing and gave me one of her newbie apartment thingies, which was my first home. When the time period on that ran out (one month, it was gone all to quickly *sighs*) I went and squatted on a friends land in one of the fancy pants snow sims. Unfortunately I did have to fly across two sims from the telehub, but nevermind. (Side note: I miss telehubs, you got to see people at them and it was all very exciting, I landed on Anshe Chung once). After this my land baron friend (once again, back in the days where land barons were proper barons and they had a little list on the SL website that they used to masturbate over saying who had the most land and none of them used bots) sold me some land for nowt in Quat (I was shagging him at the time) and on this I attempted to build a gypsy caravan (crap) and a pub (also crap)

Me and Tie sometime around christmas 04, dressed as
half snails and standing on my pub

Shortly after all this I had to leave SL, and didn't come back til 2006. I bought a plot in Yawgoo, sadly not because it had a funny name. After that I went and squatted with Tie I think, it's all extremely fuzzy, in Tofte and from then on we bought the sim (*smug*).

It's weird though, even having a sim (*more smug*) I still miss Quat, I dunno, it was all very homely, Play Sexy just round the corner, lots of water and stuff. There's still land for sale there and I'm still tempted at times. But then I am a crazy person.

Help meh!

So if y'all read my previous post about people who be begging and shit. Well... I've had a whole heap O' trouble from that. Yes my poor pixel arse is getting sued *sighs dramatically*

So in true style of keeping you updated here's the skinny.

Lieh Nessen: hello remenber me?
Kitty Lalonde: Sadly yes
Lieh Nessen: i dont liked to see
Lieh Nessen: my conversation in a websitye
Lieh Nessen: website*
Kitty Lalonde: Well I don't like to be harrassed by scabs in the middle of a shop, and neither do my friends
Kitty Lalonde shrugs
Lieh Nessen: ^^
Lieh Nessen: great
Lieh Nessen: i holp you press delete soon
Lieh Nessen: bye
Kitty Lalonde: 'kaay

This was about a week ago and then today I got...

Lieh Nessen: HEY
Lieh Nessen: I SAID FOR TAKE OFF THAT CONVERSATION FROM THE INTERNET
Kitty Lalonde: Did you?
Lieh Nessen: yes
Kitty Lalonde: Oh dear...
Lieh Nessen: better you take or you will get problems with the justice
Lieh Nessen: you cant put my name in a spot without my permission
Lieh Nessen: do you knew?
Kitty Lalonde: Ummmm
Kitty Lalonde: What justice? Is it anything like the Justice League?
Lieh Nessen: ...
Lieh Nessen: im not kidding dear
Kitty Lalonde: Well technically, it's not really your name
Lieh Nessen: is my caracter name
Kitty Lalonde: It's the name of your second life avatar, which, in theory is owned by linden labs
Lieh Nessen: so it tecgnically is my name
Kitty Lalonde: Well it'd be kinda hard for someone to take issue with really
Kitty Lalonde: And to be honest, if you hadn't been such a scab it wouldn't be there in the first place would it?
Kitty Lalonde shrugs
Lieh Nessen: i give you 1 week
Lieh Nessen: bye
Kitty Lalonde: Buh bai now!
Lieh Nessen: vai te foder por agora

Which was all terrifying as you may well imagine. Much shaken now I got a call from her 'Lawier'

Alessa Christen: Hello mrs. Lalonde
Kitty Lalonde: Hello?
Alessa Christen: Iam a Lawier
Alessa Christen: I came to talk about you website
Kitty Lalonde: Oh yes..
Alessa Christen: You could have problems with the justiçe... because you cant put name of people in a Website without their permission
Alessa Christen: I'm just here to advice you
Alessa Christen: So I hope you will clear that post...
Alessa Christen: Bye
Alessa Christen: Thank you for your attention :)
Kitty Lalonde: Well yes, I'm sure you can't (obviously ignoring the countless celebrities and other household names who have their names mention in websites on a daily basis) but it's not her name, it's an online moniker and therefore owned by linden labs, THEY however do have a policy on not posting conversations. However it's not for the whole web, just the second life site, and SL itself
Kitty Lalonde: So umm yeah! Have a nice day y'all
Alessa Christen: If you dont clear it in about 21 week, Lieh Nessen has the right to report it to the autorities
Kitty Lalonde: Okies
Alessa Christen: With her SL name someone can get her personal Details
Alessa Christen: Unless she give you permission to do what you did
Alessa Christen: Have a very nice day
Kitty Lalonde: Well okies, but I'm afraid I'm going to counter claim for misleading information
Kitty Lalonde: And general breaches of the trades description acts
Kitty Lalonde: And AR for harrassment
Kitty Lalonde: Both of you
Kitty Lalonde: Ta ra now!
Alessa Christen: Bye
Alessa Christen: I work with Law...
Alessa Christen: Better be carefull honey
Kitty Lalonde: Darlin' you can't even spell lawyer
Kitty Lalonde smiles
Alessa Christen: So sweet...

Meanwhile back at Kitty Lalonde is a slandering biatch HQ

Tiernan Serpentine: Oh hiya, I was just looking at your profile. There's a bit you need to change
Lieh Nessen: ?
Tiernan Serpentine: "please dont ask me for mony or beg for something"
Tiernan Serpentine: Thanks!
Lieh Nessen: do i know you??:S
Tiernan Serpentine: Yes you were begging me for money the other day
Lieh Nessen: a..
Lieh Nessen: can you go to ... can you dont molest me?
Lieh Nessen: ty
Tiernan Serpentine: You IM'd me dear, I didn't IM you the first time. I'm not molesting anyone just saying it's a bit naughty telling people not to beg you for money when you go around begging hehe
Lieh Nessen: wow great
Lieh Nessen: shut up now
Tiernan Serpentine: Okies, bye bye now!

That's all for now, as I wait to dodge the fearsome shadowy lawyer creatures and snipers bullets, I will leave you with some helpful advice.

If people try and skank a few L$ out of you, just orbit them. It's a lot less time consuming.

Pay attention!

Okay okay, I didn't make it, wish I had but sadly no.

This does start slow but ends up funny so please bear with it you tiny little ADD freaks you!

A tiny rant and something fun

*take deep breath* Basically... I'm kinda scoobied as to why someone, who has said that they will be unable to SL for technical reasons, even going so far as to place a donation box to raise money to fix said difficulties so they can return to SL. Then they apparently spend every day from then on going to the LAGGIEST PLACES IN SECOND LIFE.

Smells like horse shit to me but nevermind.


As promised summit fun, here's a little fun thing that lets you drive a teeny tiny (yellow) car all over the google maps. Harder than it looks (I spent five minutes on the A30 before realising I was going the wrong way) but muchos fun!

Enjoy!

I am...

A clumsy giant squid who likes to kneel on toes.

Find out what you are!

(Annoying music, sowwy)

Fun with tramps

Lieh Nessen: Hi
Lieh Nessen: can you help me?
Kitty Lalonde: Depends on what sort of help you want
Kitty Lalonde smiles
Lieh Nessen: i need 90 lindens can you help me with 1 or 2 lindens please??? sorry for being molesting but i cant make camp, cause i dont receive the money :(
Lieh Nessen: wow
Lieh Nessen: love your boots
Lieh Nessen: ^^
Kitty Lalonde: Thank you, but I'm sorry hun, I'm brassic at the minute, nice boots don't come cheap
Lieh Nessen: ?
Lieh Nessen: i just asked
Lieh Nessen: for money
Lieh Nessen: i dotn said for you give me
Lieh Nessen: i asked
Lieh Nessen: why are you being rude?
Kitty Lalonde: Yes, I said I don't have any
Lieh Nessen: oh good bye
Kitty Lalonde sighs

Also.....

Lieh Nessen: hi can you hel pme?
Tiernan Serpentine: What do you need?
Lieh Nessen: hello?
Lieh Nessen: can you help me?
Tiernan Serpentine: Ummm yes hi? I asked what you needed
Lieh Nessen: oh you
Lieh Nessen: lol
Lieh Nessen: sorry
Lieh Nessen: need 90 lindens
Lieh Nessen: ca you help
Lieh Nessen: me with 1 or 2?
Lieh Nessen: please?
Tiernan Serpentine: Sorry no
Lieh Nessen: hum ok

And so......

You shout: Can one of the boys in here please off that poor girl who's IMing everyone for money some cash in return for a blowjob... kthnxbai
You shout: *offer
Tiernan Serpentine shouts: Off her? That's a bit drastic...
You shout: It was a TYPO now SHUSH

The fun!

Oh bugger... AND

Has anyone noticed that Brutal Honesty (after being dead for months *snickers*) is now invite only? Oh the long run its course drahma!

I is all famous and shit!

So I got to meet CodeBastard Redgrave on some sort of photostudio event releasing thingy. We got all chatty and she turned out to be an MG fan (and a complete and total slut too, but hey! The best ones always are *winks*).

Anyhoo, upshot of a long story is I gots to be one of the Boudoir Rouge babe creatures and THAT is my photo. You can see everyone else from the collection (as I'm all nice a stuff) here.

p.s. GO ME!!!

p.p.s. Abyss boots ftw

You prolly didn't know I was gone but...

I have been gallavanting around the english countryside (Brum and Lahnden) for the last two days without any interwebby AT ALL. Which was all very fun/depressing/new for me.

Me and Tie headed to the big smoke to go and see the remains of a crazy egotistical blokes dreams of umm craziness. Otherwise know as the Emperor of Qin's Terracotta Army.

As you may/may not know the British Museum got they're sticky paws (although they were most likely told to clean them first) on some of these statue thingies, and bought them back to Londoncestershire to show all the excitable british people (Or those who felt to pay 10 quid to look a big clay men).

Actually I sound terribly flippant as it was all very cool (And crowded, dear god what I would have given for some sort of stabbing device) even if me and Tie spent more time snickering over the horses genitalia and what the blokes were doing with their hands.

So anyhoo, for those that care, that's where I've been, and now I'm back but may be uncommunicatable as I will most probably being sordi.... I mean productive, in my dunge... Shop, yes shop.

Danke

Day of the Tentacle

Picture Credits from left to right: Druss Mandala, Tiernan Serpentine and Kitty Lalonde

Kitty Lalonde slobbers over your shoulder
Tiernan Serpentine moans softly as the thick goo slides down her skin
Druss Mandala waves, "Alright Barry"
Kitty Lalonde: Oh, hiya Dave. Good weekend with the missus?
Druss Mandala: Oh yeah same old, you know. We went down the swamp again
Tiernan Serpentine narrows her eyes
Kitty Lalonde: Oh nice, still it's a break innit
Druss Mandala: Oh aye, nice change from the office and all
Kitty Lalonde nods wistfully
Druss Mandala: How's things with you?
Druss Mandala: Little ones still at school?
Kitty Lalonde: Oh, not bad, can't comlain really, although I'm a bit worried with BT laying off so many engineers at the moment
Kitty Lalonde: I mean my qualifications are good but..
Kitty Lalonde: There were some nasty rumours back along
Druss Mandala nods in sympathy
Kitty Lalonde slops on the floor
Druss Mandala: Still, you could always go back to your old job in the pub
Kitty Lalonde: I could, it just seems like a step back. You know? And Denise is putting pressure on me to get her up the duff
Druss Mandala scratches his arse with a tentacle
Kitty Lalonde sighs and bubbles sadly
Druss Mandala: Denise? Blimey mate, you moved on from that Gertrude quickly
Druss Mandala: She still at uni?
Kitty Lalonde: Yeah, she was never going to hang around. Plus she used to say I had a tiny tentacle. I mean, c'mon, a large slimy monster can only take so much
Tiernan Serpentine bites her lip and holds her hand up, "Ummm is it true that you lot rape women horribly?"
Kitty Lalonde: Scuse us love, do you mind? Private conversation
Druss Mandala: Pffft I saw your tentacle in the changing rooms at the local pool, and it's not tiny at all! Not that I was looking or anything but y'know, you can't help but notice stuff...
Kitty Lalonde: Aww Dave, you've always been good to me you 'ave
Tiernan Serpentine looks deeply embarrassed, "Oh I'm sorry..."

Huzzah!

Saving you time on domestic chores. Get your monitor cleaned ONLINE!

Clean the Screen

Fucksocks I got tagged. AGAIN!

That bloody Willow 'Bungelow' Caldera has tagged me cos she is EVIL! Here's the rules.

1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people.

After many minutes of tortured decision making (I mean it's not that absurd that I might be reading Sigmund Freud at the moment) I decided to tell the semi truth (the bit from that dirty slutty Beauty book that Tie made me read was, tragically, very very dull) and went with the Russel Brand autobiography, My Booky Wook.

"I was unemployed, penniless, birdless and desperate for his approval; we were the perfect holiday companions. On the plane home he said 'I went away with a boy and came back with a man'. Both of these people were me, so what happened to induce such a significant transition?"

All very poignant indeed (I'm saying nothing about the prostitute shagging).

Actually it is a very fucking good book. Go buy.

OH! Tagging! Right I will be tagging Rosie Shark, Lillie Yifu, Trinity Serpentine, Tiernan Serpentine and Mygdala March

Doned

Keep Dreamin'

Ok ok, I'm perfectly aware that blogging a dream you had is a bit lame but... Fuck off! My blog, so nyer.

The thing is I have the freakiest dreams ever so I shall share them so you can all see what a loon I am and ostracise me from society.

It all started when I had gone to a place I lived at when I was around 12, it's a little town called Yateley somewhere along the Surrey/Hampshire border. So in my dream I'd gone back, for whatever reason, and was quite happily wandering around when a giant (and I mean proper giant, this thing could be dating Godzilla and still wouldn't be able to wear heels) fly type creature set about DESTROYING THE EARTH!

Some how me and Tie survived but were taken in by a Gorean camp who told us that everyone was dead and kept us in nasty slave conditions. Interestingly these slave conditions were not silks/nakie/little silver bells hanging from your minge. But just normal clothes. I met Tie up briefly when she jumped over a wall which featured a 20ft drop on the other side. Then she was all bruised and shit but had to go and work anyway. By this point it all gets a bit hazy as to the timeline of events. But there were definately big rooms full of things pertaining to a person or persons. There was an Elton John room. Some sort of boyband and a film which may or may not exist, but it was all 80's and culty.

Anyhoo, then I went to be collared *sighs* and the room was a bit like a place called Dairy Land. Now there's no pictures of the milking room on the site, but that's what it was like with a big perspex table thing. It all got a bit hazy from that point. But then I was in a field in a car with a gorean master creature scampering round outside but he'd left the keys in! So I leapt in the front seat much to the dismay of the six other slavey creatures (Who all hated me) and sped off only to discover when I hit the main road that THE GOREANS WERE LYING! There were cars and peoples everywhere, but now the police were chasing us with the gorean and it was all incredibly exciting but I woke up... Which was a bit sucky.

Anyhoo, lil insight into my world there.